Phnom Penh

The $1.40 Haircut

There are always plenty of things in Asia that just astound me and keep me entertained, such as when parents ride with their kids on motor bikes the kids have no helmets but the parents do. But there is also things that surprise you such as when I walked by this hairdressing salon today I asked if they could cut my hair? They said no its only for girls. So I moved on and just by chance saw another salon and asked the same question. They giggled for a bit then said ok. I asked them how much? they said $1.40 (5000 Riel which is the local currency ). Anyway I sit down and the young Cambodian girl places me in the chair and I start to tell her in a fashion, what I want with my haircut. The next thing I know there are 3 other girls gathered around, not just standing but sitting down in chairs like a small audience. If that wasn’t enough, one of the girl hands me a mobile phone and I naturally say “Hello” . Now I don’t know anyone in this city so I find myself talking to this Cambodian guy who speaks English (sort of) and he was asking me what sort of haircut I want. So it’s kind of like haircut by Correspondence. I explain I want a “Same Same” haircut but just shorter. He then spent about 5 mins explaining to girl what I wanted. I’m sure the phone call was more expensive than the haircut. Next thing I know, the guy rolls up on a motor bike to meet me in person and to see if the haircut was satisfactory.

The People Smuggling

Leaving Laos

Although it was hard to leave Gilligan’s Island, and especially as travel friends Mark and Jo from Sydney had made a mammoth 2 solid days of bus rides to have the band back together, I think it was time to go. I purchased a bus ticket from Don Det in Southern Laos to Phnom Penh in Cambodia. The cost was $26 and we had all heard stories of getting held up at the border and having to pay money to the Police to get across. This guy who sold me the ticket said “No Problems- Guaranteed.” It was then I started to get worried. I took a boat and as it happens some great Canadians – Lindsey and Owen were with me on the same boat. They told us at this point that we were to say to anyone who looked remotely official that we were only going to the first town over the border and never under any circumstances, show your ticket for the bus. That gave me a lot of confidence. We then got into a minivan to the Lao/Cambodian border. We were stamped out of Lao, put into a second car and proceeded to Cambodia to get Visas. At this point we started to realise that the Police were not happy with our drivers taking us over the border so they called a meeting. They went to a shady tree and had it out and there was alot of yelling and screaming. The problem was that all the money to get us across was going to mainly Lao people who pay some money to Cambodians for the majority of the 13 hr trip. The police want the bulk of it to go to services in Cambodia. Anyway without becoming too political I arrived in Phnom Penh at 9pm after switching minivans another 3 times. Now, I’m all for a good tour but I had basically being part of a people smuggling service across the border. It has the word dodgy written all over this one.

This is Gilliagns Island

Gilligan’s Island
After my sleeping bus episode, I was bussed out as I have covered nearly half of Laos by bus in 24 hrs. I needed to rest. I stopped at Pakse but to be honest there was really nothing there. I had a nice big room with a great breeze flowing through but had to move on the first thing the next day. It was to a place they call the 4000 Islands. It is literally thousands of Islands and sand bars that rest in the Mekong River, and during the rainy season about half of then disappear. So a lazy 2000 islands go underwater. One such Island “Don Det” manages to stay above the water line all year round. You arrive by boat from the mainland and the first thing I see is a huge water buffalo lying on the sand. You step around him and you are in the town which goes for about 100 metres. As you look for accommodation you realise that this place is quite primitive these Laotians have been like this for hundreds of years. My hut has a large balcony with a hammock overlooking the Mekong where long tailed boats go up and down and the odd fisherman drifts pass. I am sitting in a restaurant writing this blog on the river as we speak. There are no cars on the Island just a few motor cycles and push bikes available to hire everywhere for a dollar a day. There are waterfalls, and sunsets to die for here and your hut is $3.20 (Aussie Dollars) per night. Food is incredible, particularly breakfast, rice dishes and fruit. The very first tourist only set foot here about 10 years ago. I kind of hope they don’t spoil it. One of the attractions here are the fresh water dolphins that can be seen from the nest Island. You are lucky to sight them and don’t expect a show like at Seaworld.
There are two weddings here today and the music is incredibly loud, and heaps of the local “Beerlao” is being consumed.
Last night I got up at about 2 am to go to the toilet and went down the stairs with my eyes barely opened and just turned on my torch and there not more than half a metre away was this water buffalo. I quickly woke up and the water buffalo must of got a fright seeing me (no comment please) so he took off leaving dust in his wake.
This place is not for the faint-hearted. There is no hot water, squat toilets, no electricity and the shower water comes straight out of the Mekong. They have generators from 6pm to 10pm so you have lights for 4 hrs only. If you need to recharge something like your phone or camera, then you bring it to the restaurant and it charges while you eat. And girls, sorry no hairdryers, unless you want to literally stand in the middle of a restaurant and dry your hair anytime during 6pm and 10pm.

Southern Laos

The sleeping Bus
I arrived back in the capital of Vientiane, and although I just got off a four and a half hour bus ride, I heard you could get down to the south of Laos by and overnight bus with beds on it. So I made some enquires and sure enough, such a bus exists so I bought a ticket to Pakse which is about 11 hours away. I get to the bus station at 8pm and blow me down there are buses with only beds on it and no seats. After a bit of confusion about what bus I was on, I finally got on board and was shown to my bed by a bus hostess. Now you have to picture walking on to a bus and bunk beds either side with the entire back section taken up by 4 beds on top and 4 on the bottom. It was hilarious, until I found out what happens. The beds are about the size of a small single bed and then I found out it sleeps two. Now if you’re a couple then fair enough but I was alone so they gave me my own bed. I couldn’t of been happier as I lay down with two pillows, two blankets, air con on my face, going very well. The bus took off and I was wrapped that I had it all to myself. Twenty mins into the trip this local guy from Lao appears and indicates through gestures that he wants to get into the bed with me. So I move over and as he was quite small he sort of just rolled over and went to sleep. Now I don’t know about you but having a complete stranger from another country in your bed for the next ten and a half hours didn’t exactly thrill me. Not only that the lights on the bus were out and I couldn’t even see what this bloke looked like. If I had to describe him in a line up, it would be small, dark hair and he was from Laos. What happened next was even more alarming. As I was trying to get to sleep, his left leg kept on crossing over mine and I was pushing it back then another 5 mins this would happen again. He then rolled over and he slept with both hands behind his head. Every time I moved, his elbow would go into my ear. What I thought was going to be the best bus trip ever was turning into a nightmare. At one stage he tried to cross his feet over mine and now I was so wide awake, the concept of the “Sleeping Bus” was starting to become a dumb idea. As it turned out the bus stopped at about 2.30am for a break. When I got back on, my sleeping partner was nowhere to be seen. I felt a bit shallow as he didn’t write or send a card- I miss him. LOL.

Laos just after Christmas

In the Tube

Vientiane is the Capitol of Laos and situated right on the Mekong river. When you look across the river you can see the lights and bustle of Thailand which is a distinct difference to the virtually rural Laos. A few days in Vientiane was enough before taking the 4 hr bus trip to an old stomping ground of mine in Vang Vieng. This place is set on a backdrop that a Hollywood blockbuster would die for. The main features in this town is the river and the mountains so all the activities are geared towards them both. Kyaking, walking, cave exploring and of course “Tubing”. Now I know I have wrote in a previous blog about tubing before but they have cranked it up a notch or two. As you float in your tractor tyre inner tube, down the Song River, the stops along the way have become quite sophisticated. Not only do they serve a large range of refreshments and food, but there Flying foxes and rope swings are getting bigger and faster. There is one stop that has a huge water slide, about 30 metres, with a curl at the end (ski jump style) that catapults you into the river at the rate of knots. I have the bruises to prove it. Whatever the opposite to responsible serving of alcohol is then this town would win a gold medal by the length of the straight. There is happy hours, buckets, cocktails, 2 for 1, and you can even get your own tapped keg delivered to your table and you just pour the beer yourself. The main culprit is a really nice local beer called “Beerlao”. A large bottle in a restaurant is less than 2 Aussie dollars. Go Figure.Its new years eve tonight and I can sense a calm before the storm. I’m a tad worried as I have a 9.30am bus to catch in the morning with another 4 hr trip back to Vientiane. Anyway I’m off tubing for one last time. ps: Click on the “Pics” to enlarge them.Next Blog Southern Laos

Christmas Day 2008

When is Big too Big?

The relatively new Bangkok airport is massive by anyone terms. The actual arrival and departure lounge has got to be one of the biggest buildings I have ever seen. To think they less than a month ago the entire airport was closed due to protesters exercising their rights with disapproval of the government. I’m not going to enter into the politics however, I’m just wondering if it’s too big. I took an internal Air Asia flight which is the Asian answer to Jetstar, to Thailand’s north to a place called Udon Thani. Air Asia is very busy and a dozen counters to check into regardless of where you are going. What I like about it is that if its getting close to your flight closing, these girls come around with a sign with your flight number and destination and fast track you through a couple of special counters they have for that purpose. So within 10 mins I was through,(otherwise it would have been 45 mins.) The gates and areas are quite well signed but it’s a hell of a long way. So they have huge people movers which are great if you want to be on one and walk until you come up against some fat arse tourist who decides they can hog the whole mover with themselves and their grossly oversized bag on wheels that makes my backpack look like a kindergarten kids purse. There are also heaps of shops with the latest products and of course the perfume section for women and for home. This is where I always get to try the latest Hugo Boss, Giovanni, or Tommy as they leave their test bottles out. A couple of quick sprays and I’m out of there heading for the departure gate. Straight on to the bus and then it’s a 5 min or so bus ride pass dozens of idle planes that are lined up like those kids on the beach in the Qantas ad. What I do notice though is the ridiculous colours that some of the planes are. In particular Bangkok Air, who fly to Koh Samuii and the likes. They make Ken Done’s creations look like he was painting in the dark. Anyway after the plane started taxing it took another 18 mins to take off as we were so far away from the runway. I think we used less fuel in air as we did taxing to the runway. After seeing the organised kaos at Bangkok we landed at Undon Thani. And yep, you guessed it we were the only plane in the whole airport.
Next Blog will be from Laos.

Crossing the road

Good Morning Vietnam

Well this Chrissy Holidays brings me back to Vietnam. This is my third time in Saigon and although I don't get phased much, but the increase in traffic is unbelievable. There are motorbikes ontop of motorbikes here as this very patient and calm traffic system works its way out and the calmness of the riders and drivers leaves alot to be desired to us from Oz.

Crossing the road brings ona skill that involves guts, local knowledge and trust. The main roads have a constant flow of traffic and it can be up to eight bikes / cars deep. Ok here is the trick. You take a look at the other side o the place you want to go. You simply stary walking at a slow but constant pace and this is where the trust comes in. The bikes and to some extent the cars, simply go around you. It jsut seems to work. Now for the novice, or what I call "The hesitator" things may turn out a bit different. The bikes then have no idea what you are doing and then Kapow. You end up wearing a front handle bar.

Its New Years Eve about 4pm and I'm heading off to ge some photos and then out somewhere, not sure where, but will be back in 2008.

Ok Back and New Years was at a place called WAX on the beach. There were the usual suspects, like loads of westerners and a sprinkling of locals that all got into the spirit of things. Heaps of Booze and a beach bonfire which went down well in the 30 degree evening. There were a couple of western fire juglers and one girl in particular from Scandavia that could juggle a couple of hot balls with precision.

Then a few heroes decided to jump the fire towards the end of the night with at least one ending up in hospital.

Collecting your Bags

Picking up your bag at the Airport

What is it about airline passengers collecting bags?? I just don't get it! Yesterday I checked into Matteram Airport in Lombok for my flight back to Bali. Its a mainly domestic airport, although I did hear that a couple of International flights do go out of here. They have the normal x-ray machines, and you put your bag through and then they get out those little plastic trays to put your phone etc... Well as my main bag disappeared into the machine, there was a blackout in the entire airport. My bag was stuck in the middle of the x-ray machines. I had immediate thoughts of the control tower losing power while giving crucial instructions to a plane landing or taking off. After 30 seconds or so power was restored, out came my bag and no apparent damage had been done.
Arrived back in Bali and then proceeded to the one of two baggage carousels. Now here is my problem. I have yet to take a flight where this doesn't happen. As it turned out I was the first to walk in to the baggage area since I was on the transit bus last. I walked to the second carousel not knowing where the bags would come out. Everyone followed and proceeded to crowd around the carousel like vultures surrounding a wounded goat. I then backed right away and moved more over to the first carousel, yet stood at least 5 metres back. Within about five minutes carousel no 1 started to move. So everyone rushed over with trolleys and those without ran; yes ran, to get a prime position for their bag. Now, their bag has not come out yet, but they are standing there guarding their turf like the police taping off a crime scene. It absolutely astounds me. If everybody stood back 5 meteres or so, and when their bag came, move forward and pick it off. No, they have to hold their ground and take up space for the people whose bags are really coming out. This is where I always seem to get into trouble. I see my bag, and say excuse me and pull my bag off, hitting up to 3 people (on a good day) with it because they refuse to move. When the odd person objects I just mumble "well you didn't move when I said excuse me" and they don't chase you because , yes you guessed it. They will loose their hard earned sacred spot.

"The sweepers" and You are cutting my grass.

One thing that I have never come to grips is the fact that all the Indonesians who have the responsibility of cleaning either your hotel, bungalow, Pondok, hut or even the street start at an ungodly hour. I do see that it's a cool part of the day and the relentless heat and sun haven't started piercing the trees yet, but they seem to do it outside your door. I have enclosed a picture of one such sweeper so you can get my drift. They use long pieces of straw bundled together by twine and use a sweeping motion to get rid of ubiquitous leaves, papers and make a little pattern in the dirt so it looks well groomed, similar to our suburban beaches. Now that in itself is not the problem. Its the fact that most tourists go out and have a few drinks and sometimes get home late. So at 6.03 am this morning there was sweeping outside my room. Its not in a constant pattern like a clock ticking but it's intermittent and non rhythmical. Thats whats drives you nuts. So the Solution. I need some help here. We just have to ask the whole of Indonesia with their ingrained culture and heritage to simply change your cleaning duties from the morning to the afternoon. How do you think we'd go?
Closely related to the sweeper is who I affectionately term "The grasscutter". I actually have a conspiracy theory here and I'm going out on a limb, and that it's possible that they are one in the same person. Ok call me mad but these people use large old metal scissors or shears to chop at the grass blade by blade. They too work the early hours in the morning, usually just after you have gone back to sleep after "The sweeper" has stopped. Are you getting my drift? When the grasscutters have stopped. Its too hot to go back to sleep anyway, so you may as well get up and have breakfast. Now I have a solution to "The Grasscutter" as well. It's called Operation "Get a goat". I think its self explanatory.
Then all the tourists who come to holiday in this great country can get some fricking sleep.